A Little Background

If you’re reading this blog, it’s likely you know me and you know my family (at least peripherally).  If you’ve come here by chance, I’d like to get you caught up.  I’m a mom and a wife and a middle school special education teacher.  I am married to a (mostly) wonderful man who thinks I am (mostly) wonderful.  I have two stepsons, a foster daughter, and two biological children.  They bring me joy and headaches.  On the best days, at least one of them brings me coffee.  In order to help you understand the family, I’d like to share something I recently posted on Facebook.

“This parenting thing swirls around in my head all the time… and I worry. God, do I worry. But often, I worry about this selfish thing. I worry about how my children reflect on ME. Which is nonsense. It’s not their job to make me look good. It’s their responsibility to learn and be a little bit better everyday. Better versions of THEMSELVES… not who others (myself included) wish they would be.

I worry that Cal is that kid who is so busy jumping out of his skin that he can’t follow the coach’s directions. I must’ve heard his name shouted 30 times during this morning’s game. But when he’s on the football field, he’s the kid who congratulates his teammates after every play. He’s the one to give a high five and say ‘good job’ and encourage everyone. This kid is kind, and friendly, and a good sport. He makes me so proud.

I worry that Lee is the opposite of studious. He rushes through everything and avoids work at all costs. I had to meet with his teachers last week to figure out how to get him to do homework. But this weekend, he’s spent two hours writing and editing a speech about being transgender… which he will deliver to 150 professionals later this week. This kid is brave and intuitive and spunky. I am so proud.

I worry that Bea is such an introvert. She resists joining things and is hesitant to take risks. She has been through so much. But this weekend, she got up in front of the entire church and sang with the band. Her voice was almost as beautiful as her smile. She is full of courage and strength, and she is incredibly talented. I am so proud.

When I try to make them into who the world thinks they should be; obedient, quiet, studious, sunny…. We all wind up feeling frustrated and disappointed. When I can manage to celebrate who they are and guide them to be a little better every day, that’s when I see the beauty of parenting.”

 

2 Replies to “A Little Background”

  1. You have a wonderful way with words and a family to be very proud of! I look forward to future installments

    1. Thanks, Kim! It’s a project I’ve been thinking about for a while, and I’m excited to get it up and running!

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