Badass

Nothing makes me feel sexier than shooting pool. The hubs and I went out last weekend. We went to a nice restaurant for appetizers, and then we found our way to our favorite dive bar for hot wings and billiards. We shot some pool and listened to a lot of country music and a little bit of really bad karaoke. This is my favorite kind of date.

I started playing pool when I was about 16. The local pool hall was the closest thing to a bar that we could legally frequent, and it made us feel all grown up. We didn’t really know what we were doing, but we were enthusiastic.

Later, in college, I dated a guy who played for money. He taught me how to shoot a decent long shot and put a little English on the cue. I thought I was hot shit. I never really got good, but I played well enough to surprise people. And, God, how I love that feeling. You know; when somebody underestimates you and then you prove them wrong and you get to gloat a little while they rearrange their preconceived notions of who you are? That’s a freaking awesome feeling.

Throughout college, I had a few other little tricks that made me feel kinda badass. I could tie a cherry stem in a knot with my tongue. I could throw back tequila shots with the best of them. And after college, I acquired my favorite bad-ass accouterment, in the form of a Suzuki Marauder 800. I was officially a biker.

My motorcycle is still my favorite claim to badassery. Just last week, someone saw it in the garage and started asking my husband about “his bike.” To be fair, my husband is the super sexy, muscular, tattooed, shaved head stereotype of a biker. And I LOVED it when he looked at this guy and said, “Actually, that’s HER bike.” Don’t get me wrong. My husband rides. But first he has to ask to borrow my bike.

But I digress. I don’t get a lot of opportunities to feel like a badass anymore. I make a pretty mean chicken pot pie and I’ve been known to kick ass on a Principal’s observation, but it’s not quite the same. I’m a mom and a wife and a teacher. I crochet and go to book club once a month. Granted, I’d probably still be voted, “Most likely to drop an F-bomb at bible study,” but I love my comfortable suburban life, and I think I’m doing things that contribute to my community in a positive way. I’m officially a grown-up. Nowadays, I mostly rock my Honda Odyssey around town. When I’m feeling really risqué, I’ll blast a little Eminem or Pink from the stereo… with the windows down.

And when I really want to feel like hot shit, I challenge my husband to a game of pool.